Plarn-tastic

So after I sorted our huge mountain of clothes and cleaned my craft room, I got all kinds of creative. I sorted through my three drawer catch all o' crafts, I cleaned out a junk drawer of pens that the prior tenants had left, and I made a list of things I need to be craftier. Then I got down to plarn business.

In the process of cleaning I found my larger scissors, so I followed the instructions pretty closely. Smooth, fold, snip, snip, snip. Making fairly even sized pieces, but you know, I'm human. It wasn't until about the tenth or twelfth bag that I realized I should be using my rotary cutter and mat that was like three inches away from me. Duh. It was so much quicker and I got perfect inch wide strips. I'm a fricking genius. 

Then I spent the rest of the night tying the loops together into a massive static-y heap. Brown fred meyer's bags are the least static prone. Wal mart has the thinnest bags, go figure. And A&P has the softest plastic out of all of them, if that makes any sense. And I had a bunch of random ones from xmas with season's greetings and whatnot written on them. As I was making the plarn I started daydreaming about where I could start shopping so I could get more interesting bags. And I started coveting bags in general. I don't have enough all of a sudden! I need plastic bags!

I ended up with a large grapefruit sized (mmm that sounds good) ball o' plarn. Which totally isn't enough to actually make something. So anyone want to unload a shit ton of not dirty or torn plastic bags? This damn dirty hippy will take them off you hands!

Plans, Scams, and Plarn Part III

Plans, Scams and Plarn Part III

Plarn

Lately I've been getting into the craft mode. I have several baby blankets or gifts that I need to make soon. Like yesterday. It'd be great if my little sis got something from me for my new nephew Bradley. Who's four month old. Way to be on it! I would like to make something for Sydne who is due in February and I have to make something for Harmonie who is due in March. So I've been looking through my books and online and getting all kinds of ideas not baby related.

I also hate plastic bags. Haaate them. But I have a ton of them. I just keep shoving them into a cabinet. And there they sit, waiting to be repurposed. I think I get it from my parents, they always had tons of bags around to "reuse" which we never really did. Except for emptying the litter box. Enter Plarn.

Plarn is plastic yarn, made from never gonna leave this earth plastic shopping bags. I found a really easy tutorial online on how to make the bags into workable yarn. I also found out about fusing bags to create fabric like material. I'm so excited. And nerdy. I can't do the fusing yet because I need wax paper. But making plarn? I'm so there! I think I'm going to make a kitchen rug first, that seems like an easy way to start out. Then maybe a shopping bag. Out of many shopping bags. Oh the nerd I am!

Now off to cut many many strips of plastic and watch the Italian Job.

Plans, Scams, and Plarn Part II

Alright Plans, Scams, and Plarn Part II

Scams

I was minding my own business about to make lunch when someone knocked on the door. It was a guy, probably early to mid twenties. His name was Justin and he said he had just got back from Iraq and was going door to door to brush up on his social skills.

Said there were about fifty of them in town. First he asked me about my job, since that's what they were supposed to ask apparently. Talked about the snow and how he isn't used to it, but might move here someday. Then he said that they are accruing points and I can help! Gee I can? Tell me how! So basically the government is having a magazine drive to get guys like him into med school. Why the big alarms didn't go off then I don't know, only the little ones did. So I looked it over. I asked him what part of the service he was in, he told me but it sounded weird. I told him I'd buy a subscription, but didn't have cash or check which is what he needed. He said he couldn't bill me and that he'd come by the bar later. I told him where I work remember? So then when he was leaving he asked if I knew the other people in the building. He asked if any of them were older. That and the weird answer about his military branch set off the big alarms. I said goodbye and emailed S. And then got really freaked out. Sure he just wanted my money, but he could have just been some insane person walking by wanting to cut up a stranger. I'm all alone with a dog who will lick you to death if anything. Big help she would be.

So one I feel like an idiot for even half believing him. But two I feel weird and violated that he came to my door. He came to where I live. And he could have been a worse person wanting to do worse things. It's just creepy and horrifying and adds to my long list of paranoia. S told me to call the non emergency police number, but I'm still to weirded out by it. So she's gonna call. She's the best. I love her so much.

And I don't want to leave the house but Zyda really has to go and I think a smoke would do me good. So I'm just gonna man up and do it.

Alright, after the doggy pee break, onto part three of our exciting tri-blog-ogy, Plarn!

Plans, Scams, and Plarn

This is going to be a three parter since blog material has been stacking up. Part one of Plans, Scams and Plarn: 

Plans

So S and I have been talking plans. Plans for us and our future. They're all good and necessary, but only one is fun. Next year start TTC! Huzzah! So of course we were all baby centered when we went out for a date on Friday (which was a blast!). Well, more donor centered. And finding the cheapest way to have a baby. Hell the hetero's do it for free, why can't we?

One of our potential donor's was at the bar, since he owns it and all, and instead of waiting for him to get liquored up, S waits until she's had several martini's and blurts out: We need your sperm, J. We need it! He just ends up laughing, we all do. It was hilarious. But I think in a year he might be willing to spare some for us. We'll see.

Oh and Friday night rocked. We haven't been doing anything fun lately, so we decided to get dressed up and go out. I'll try to upload to flickr but it takes forever. Basically we were two hot bitches if I do say so myself:)

Okay back to plans. While bartending an incredibly boring offsite event I wrote a to do list for '09. Here goes.

• Get divorced I've been separated since '06/'07, completely in love with S,  it's damn time.
  
• Pay off debt I have a very large balance that needs to go away. Hence me taking the job at the knife shop again.
  
• Start Savings Account 
• Obedience train Zyda Enough said.
  
• Lose weight I'm tired of being fat and I know I can lose it. So this is the year.
  
• Pick a career 
• Fix our relationship 
• Make money from my crafts I only mean this in that I need to push myself. I am fairly crafty, if I can make any money off of it, maybe I can make it my job.
  
• Budget! And stick to it 
• Get a passport and travel
• Take a class I've been out of school for about a decade, my brain is rotting. Any class, anywhere. From UAS to a craft class to something online. Anything.
  
• Be more communicative
  
• Learn a new skill or hobby
  
• Spend time with friends
  
• Quit smoking
  

The end. This is completely feasible for this year. There is no reason I can't do all or the majority of these things. And damn it, now it's on the internet, there's no hiding from it.

Next up Part Two: Scams

Ruling Queen of Procrasta Nation

So I got damn sick again this weekend. What the hell? I usually never get sick like that, I don't like it and I politely ask it not to happen again. No more pukey for me thanks very much. Maybe I'm developing an allergy to something, who knows?

So I was laid up on the couch last night instead of celebrating the inauguration with my friends. Lame lame lame. And we don't have cable, so I haven't seen anything about it. I'm just on the computer now to catch up on my mia days o' sickness.

So as of the last several months, we've been really bad at hanging out with our friends. Just horrible. So I invited one of my friends and her boyfriend over for Sunday dinner. That in turn meant we had to invite another couple of friends who we never hang out with. And then I couldn't leave my former roommate and her boyfriend out of it, so they came too.

Sarah kick our apartment's ass, well, she kicked the dirt's ass. She cleaned so much! And she hung pictures that we've been meaning to put up for at least a month. She did most of it the night I had to work an off site gig. And while they usually suck balls, this one was amazing! First off we got to listen to James Cotton, king of superharp, blues extraordinaire! Secondly, it was slammed the whole time which made it fun. And third, it didn't last all night, so I got to go back to the bar and relax for a bit. Things that weren't so great about it include me cutting my thumb on the foil on a wine bottle pretty early on in the night, me breaking several corks in the bottles (oops), middle aged yuppies tipping poorly and not understanding normal bar etiquette, and us running out of just about everything, especially tonic. But overall it was fantastic!

So anyway, we had our friends over, ate a ton of food and played games. Then several of us went out since it was holiday the next day, we had till 3am. And of course we used it all up. Then the next day I get super sick. I'm sure the alcohol didn't help, but I really think something else made me sick. Tuesday was spent entirely in bed. Today I'm better, but I'm tired from being sick. I really need to clean up from our friends coming over. I wanted to do it yesterday but couldn't. So that's what I should be doing right now. Or I should be walking the dog first. But I'm gonna finish this post instead. It won't take long.

I don't know how to say what I want. Ever. It's a gift I have:) And when I do, it comes out wrong. The answer to what I want is almost always the same and it's the truth. I want to be happy. Or more accurately, I want to be content. Of course there are tons of things I want, but they all add up to me being content. The biggest thing right now is her being content AND happy. And fuck I just don't know how to do that. So what do I do? It also doesn't help that I keep reading all of these baby blogs. I'm sorry I want children. It's what I've wanted since forever. A long long time ago I always said that I wanted to have my first child around 24 and my second one around 27, if not sooner. Well in less than six months I turn 28 with no hopes of child-dom in my future. And I can't just forget it and I'm sorry about that. But that's me. It's not about pressuring, it's just who I am. The end. 

This whole post should probably be ignored, my brain is still fried from the fever.

Back burner Resolutions

So I've never liked the idea of resolutions. I think it just sets everyone up for a disappointed February. But maybe that's just me. I think it's unnecessary pressure for the start of a new year. In years gone past, I gave up soda starting on my birthday in June. For whatever reason, it made more sense to me. And it worked better. I think because the hype is gone from January. 

So this year I didn't make any resolutions. Yes there are lots of things I want to change, but I don't want to fail at them. If I resolve to do or not do them, I'm gonna fail. So I'm just quietly working on them. But I do have an honest to goodness resolution. That can't take effect until the end of the summer. So I am following society and making it now, but don't have to actually follow up on it for quite a while. So maybe I won't fail! I'm kind of a genius.

Anyways, my new year's, err mid year's resolution: Once I pay off my practically maxed out credit card, I will only use it for travel. Only. No using it between paychecks and letting the debt pile up. I have a smaller card I could use for that, but hopefully I don't need that one either. But my bigger limit card should be used for fun damn it! So ideally we will be able to take several vacations a year. Or at least one. Gots to get out of this effing town sometime. 

This leads me to my summer job. I'm nervous. It's not a new job, I've worked there five years. I quit last January to only work at the bar. The job is semi seasonal. April through September is the money making time. But I usually end up working part time up until December and then sporadically until April. I have a love hate relationship with this job. There is a lot of stress. Like I should be a doctor (minus saving lives) kind of stress. Maybe working on wall street would have been a better example. But I make a ton of money during the summer months. And then there's my boss. I love my boss, don't get me wrong. But we are very different people. And we are very close friends, so I think that adds to the stress when something is fucked up. I'm just worried that it's going to be like summers in the past. I need my boss to be at work more than he is, somehow I don't meet his higher than everest expectations, dealing with douche bag employees. Every year we get at least one person who seems great and then isn't. And it's such a short season usually we try and make it work and not fire them. 

So yeah, I'm worried. But I can pay off my whole credit card if I work hard enough. That's motivation enough for me. And it will be fine in the end. Whatever happens I'll make it through. And then come fall I'm free. We will be debt free or at least massively less in debt, we could move somewhere else if we wanted, whatever we want. 

And I'm damn good at selling knives. Never wanted to be, but took the job on a lark. And there's nothing better than being able to read a person, show them what you know they want, and ring up a $1000+ sale while the other employees drool. Okay that doesn't happen everyday, but it's fucking awesome when it does.

DIY Fun!

So since my lovely Sarah kicked ass and cleaned the monster of a mess in the second bedroom, I have craft space! Woot woot. And now the creative juices are a flowin'. 

We brought up a crappy 4x6 folding table to use in there. The top is covered in spray paint and a corner is crushed and the inner particle board is showing. So this morning while snuggling with the dog I came up with my first craft project in the room. Table Makeover! I have pretty much everything left over from when I painted the dresser, sanding paper, cleaner, primer, etc. And I have two tester pouches of a red paint we were gonna use on a stool and never did. I even have some wood putty that I can fill in the crushed corner with.

So I was half asleep thinking about what to do to it and I got all kinds of carried away. First just painting it ah color. Then painting a picture on it. Then using body parts to make a picture on it ala "Better Than Chocolate", which definitely sounded like the most fun! If you haven't seen the movie, add it to your queue now! And then it even went to inlaying bottle caps or pottery bits with that liquid glass stuff.

But those ideas minus the first were reaching a bit farther than I could. So it's back to just painting it one color. Blah. But it's more fun than having a shitty table with spray paint on it.

I just filled in the corner with the wood putty and have to let it dry for an hour. Then I can sand and clean and paint. Wee fun! It's sad how excited I am. I love being crafty and artsy but never have the space, therefore I'm never motivated. But now I have tons of space and tons of motivation. Talk about a good gift! My baby rocks socks!

I met with my boss today and talked about plans for the summer. Nothing big, deciding which items to feature in coupons. But I got a tasty lunch out of it and got to see his adorably preggo wife. Who offered me a chance to sell my scarves at their glass shop this summer. Hell yeah! Any income is good! Especially if I'm getting paid for what I like to do anyway. I told her about my screen press and she was interested in that. So if I can actually produce good shirts, I could make some moola that way too. But I've got to get crackin, I'm not going to have time once the summer gets underway.

Speaking of the summer, who's coming to Alaska? Come on up, it rocks! Cruising is actually a pretty cheap way to get around and you could come see me at the knife shop! Juneau is indescribably amazing. It is truly a one of a kind town, I highly recommend it to anyone thinking about a different kind of vacation. And if you don't like the idea of being herded around which most (not all) of the cruise ships do, you have other options. The Alaska Marine Highway is a fantastic ferry system we have in southeast. You can decide which towns to see and how long you want to stick around in each town. 

So seriously, you out there in the blogsphere daydreaming about summer vacations, think about Alaska. You won't regret it. And that's coming from someone who hates it most of the time she's here:)

*I have to add something about my horrible dream I had this morning. You don't have to read it, I just need to get it out of my head.*

Holy crap, I will say it is unequivocally the SCARIEST dream I've ever had. I think it was so bad because it seemed like I was awake the whole time. I woke up when Sarah got up and then fell back asleep. But it was like I was staring at the wall next to my bed still awake. Then I started seeing these vicious faces, one in particular, over and over. And I couldn't close my eyes to make them go away. Then I started hearing voices in my head. Like "she needs a comfy jacket that lets her hug herself" kind of voices. And they were screaming and arguing and freaking me the fuck out. So I was trying to scream for Sarah in my dream, trying to wake myself up and nothing was coming out. So then I reached out to pull on the blinds to make noise so she would come in. But I didn't really do that either. This is when it gets worse. It was like I woke up but could still hear and see everything, so I was still scared. I started shaking with fear and literally shook myself off the end of the bed and ended up against the wall screaming "Mom" over and over. Which is weird cause I'm not that close to my mom. But then I realized I had to yell for Sarah if she was gonna come, so I did. But she never came. Then I actually woke up. It was fucking awful and realistic. I thought I had pulled on the blinds, I thought I had ended up on the floor. I would assume it was like a bad acid trip or a dream you'd have if you were sick with scarlet fever. Holy hell it was horrible. Then I fell back asleep and had another scary dream, but in comparison not nearly as bad.

Sick of being sick

Thursday I was coughing pretty bad so I took cough medicine, hence the weird dreams in my last post. Friday I felt out of it, not sick not well. Then comes Saturday. I woke up feeling pretty good. I had some buttered toast and coffee/cocoa and settled in to our marathon of Friends. As I'm sitting there I realize how nauseous I was becoming. And as the day went on it just got worse. I ended up throwing up at least 6 times that evening. It pretty much went drink water, wait a few minutes, puke, feel good for a while until I thought I was better at which time I would drink water or eat "ah" cracker and the process would repeat. Over and over. And somewhere along the way I developed a fever. Pretty rad Saturday.

I feel kind of better today. Still no energy and I don't want to try and eat, lest I become chained to the bathroom again. Sorry for the disgusting post but that's what's going on in my life.

Sarah is not sick and hopefully won't become so. She has all kinds of cleaning energy, which is great since I sure as hell don't. While I had some energy this morning we moved the extra bed downstairs and a bunch of empty boxes and the old dog bed. And we brought up a folding table we will use in the second room. I really want to use that room. As it is, we're paying like 300 extra bucks for a giant junk room, which isn't so good. But if we can get it organized it's worth it. I can start using my screen press and maybe sell stuff! That would be fantastic, but it'd be fun just to use it. 

Off to eat some crackers. Mmm crackers.

Oh yeah...I'm pretty sure this is the first time I've been stomach sick without alcohol involved since I was in high school. Awesome. That's kind of good right? Means I'm usually healthy unless I do something to screw it up.

The Beginning of the End of the Aughts

I really can't believe it's 2009. How strange is that? But what's more strange is that I'm incredibly filled with hope for this new year. This really can be a fresh start. I can make changes in my life that I need to. I can do anything, it's a new year. Everything that happened in the past is just that, the past. I like that thought. I'm gonna try and hang on to it.

So what happened to the Lion-Berrys at the end of the year? Let's see. Monday night I went out with our friend V, got super darn drunk, big surprise. V spent the night cause we're responsible like that. When she left Tuesday morning she locked the door knob. Makes sense, right? Wouldn't want anyone breaking into our place. Especially whilst I sleep off my drunkeness. Fast forward to that afternoon and I finally take the dog out. We go out in the yard, she runs around, blah blah blah. Come back upstairs, yup, door's locked. We don't have a key to the door knob. At all. We just use the deadbolt. Luckily I had my cell phone on me. Called the property manager and he came up forever later. Didn't have the right key, had to be gone forever again. But he gave me several smokes since mine were locked inside. Anyway, the doggie and I spent about an hour locked out. She really did not understand why we had to be by the door instead of inside of it by the heater. But it all worked out in the end.

That night I made steak and potatoes and sauteed carrots and green beans. I was very impressed, seeing as how I don't eat a lot of meat and I cook it even less. But it was pretty tasty, Sarah said she liked it.

Wednesday I had to work. Of course I did, I'm a bartender. I got there at 8 and frantically tried to over stock everything so that we wouldn't run out while the place was packed. And actually the night when pretty well. While it was slow for the first couple of hours I had some drunk guys buying me shots. So that helped my attitude immensely. We didn't have any fights, which is a damn miracle. And it slowed down enough that I was able to leave early! I was told I could leave around 2, but I had to enter in a bunch of credit card slips if I wanted my cut of the tips. Oh hell yeah. So I ended up getting out of there around 40 after. Just when the other bars are closing. Ending up having a swig of Beam on the street (always classy) and then helping my incredibly drunk friend get to her house. All the while freezing my ass off. Then I got my new years kiss the next morning from Sarah. Who slept through the new years, I'll have you know:)

We finished the second season of Prison Break, like two days after we got it. Last night we just finished Carnivale. I'm sad it's only two seasons long, but there is no way they could make a third. Now we're onto the 9th season of Friends that I got from Sarah's SIL. I love me some Friends. 

Today I'm sick-ish. I don't know if I'm actually sick or if it's cause I took cough medicine last night. That stuff makes me so out of it. I had some uber weird dreams because of it. One where I had to go through some security scan to enter a hotel and the lady said that my weight was unhealthy. And I said yeah I know. But my weight was like 500+ lbs. Yikes. But I didn't cough.

I'm gonna let the pooch run. Then I might be back to talk about day dreams of warmer climes, babies, and entrepreneur ideas.